Hey Guys, so earlier on today i saw this quote shared on social media; honestly, it really divided my feelings. To begin with, i was in agreement. I think it’s important for people to help build others and encourage them, but then i thought about how often people get dragged down trying to build another.
On the one side i think it’s really important to accept that no one is perfect and that everyone has flaws they need to work on. It’s perfectly okay and loving to want to help build someone up. It’s okay to want to help someone grow as a person. What is not okay is for this person to drag you down.
There is a fine line between someone who is a ‘work in progress’ wanting to change and someone who is not bothered about building themselves up but likes the attention.
Don’t set yourself on fire to see others warm.
I have been in situations where i’ve sacrificed so much to help another person better their life. I defended them when people bad mouthed them, i skipped classes to make sure they were okay, all because i wanted to see them grow as a person, i wanted to help them have a better life. But in the end all of that dragged me down.
By all means, help people, encourage them to grow. Its so important to support people in life. But if you are sacraficing things, losing people and destroying your life in the process, it’s okay to walk away. Don’t feel like you have to stay around.
The company you keep can make or break your mindset
Of course there is a completely opposite end to this. I am lucky to be with someone who makes me a better person and have someone who wants to grow with me, so we can support each other. It’s important to be with someone who helps their own self as much as you do them.
Don’t be afraid to go for someone who isn’t where they want to be. One of the best things about a relationship is the journey you go on together. However, don’t feel that you have to stay and build someone who isn’t interested in being fixed. If helping someone with their life is making yours unhappy, it’s okay to walk away. It’s okay to be selfish and focus on your life.
I think the main thing i’m trying to say is, be with someone who wants to grow with you, not someone who wants you to better their own life but not help themselves in the process.
Most importantly put yourself first. Your life, your health and your happiness are the most important thing.
Wishing you all the best,
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